One thing that experience has taught me is that accepted truths about home and family are not always accurate. For example, the idea that the mother is the heart of the family, the nurturer, is not necessarily the absolute.
Throughout my early and middle years, my mom and dad's house was the gathering place. We all celebrated Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas and weekends! Mom and dad had a huge table, and we filled it completely. We laughed, talked, ate and seemed to love one another. Then my dad had a massive heart attack and stroke. He remained with us for five years, fooling all the doctors, and they were the best five years of my life. I spent much time with him, working on tractors, lawn mowers, sitting and chatting, and aggravating one another. The family still got together, but it was different. Acceptance of his weakness was a difficult thing for them possibly. Perhaps, dad didn't have the energy that before bound us to one another. Dad died on Nov 11, 2000. That day was the saddest day in my life. I lost a parent, a champion, a friend, a rock.
My family dynamics changed. No longer was the family table filled, no longer were special occasions or weekends a time for gathering and sharing. My dad was gone, the heart that kept the family alive.
Don't misunderstand me. My mom loved us, but it was a different kind of love. She lasted for five years after dad and joined him in March 2006. I miss her, but rejoice that she and dad are back together. Perhaps they are preparing the table for us once again.
The moral of this is that fathers can make a tremendous difference in a family. I found that my dad was the tie that bound us together.
14 comments on Reflection on My Family
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You and Father's such as you are so Special.
Trust me,We do know it..I wonder sometime's how he did raise and hold us together,the three of us,as well as he did.I know he did a great job.
God Bless Dad's like you,who stick it out and raise us,keep us together..[HEART]
[HEART]
I know right where your coming from Angie.My Dad passed away Easter 10 year's ago.
He was my rock.
I miss him so much..
He was the man in my life that guided in the right direction every time I needed it.
I miss seeing this big tough Dutch man,my Dad.
I talk to my Dad too.
Alway's in my dream's over the phone..
We go to our family camp,we as kid's helped our Dad build..
He is there with us each and everytime..
We put his ashes in the river across from our camp,the place we had the most fun..
[HEART] Thank You for this post...